I've been called a lot of things

"So, you've got an iPod, a Dell Handheld, a blog and a Scion? You're a yuppie."
-Matt M., friend and former roommate.

I've been called a lot of things, but a yuppie? My retort: I still own an axe. Yuppies don't own axes, nor do they keep the axe (that they don't own) in their bedrooms as a conversation piece. Also, I am missing the cute wife (which may or may not have something to do with said axe) and a black or chocolate lab.

But yes, it looks like I will be the owner of a new lil Scion xA. It's described as "tough, sleek and ready to roll," just like me.

God damn an American economy and insurance industry where despite paying the equivalent of millions of dollars (factoring in Dave-flation and Dave-brokeness) per year on car insurance on a shitty car to begin with, it is more sensible for me to get another car instead of paying for the damages from an unprofessional break-in.

It's been a distressful month. It takes a lot to get me truly distressed, but one thing always does the trick: Expenses. This month, that's three-fold -- new car, new apartment/room and potentially, some officespace for words, inc.

Nonetheless, despite the proverbial wrench this vehicle situation has thrown into my plans, I am of course excited to get the damned thing. I don't have the Scion yet. It's on its way to its new home from Los Angeles and hence I am looking at about a week of driving my current car sans window and using two hands to shift; one to move the dash board pieces away from the knob, the other to actually shift gears.

It's taking a week because there isn't a single one in Utah stripped-down without any options -- that's how I roll.

Sample from dealer conversation:
Dealer: What about floor mats? You must want floor mats.
DMo: How much?
Dealer: $120.
DMo: Seriously? Take 'em out.
Dealer: Well, it's on it's way with floor mats. We'll have to take them out when it gets here.

Again, that's how I roll.

Thanks to everyone who has provided me with some empathy in this situation (it's amazing how many people have had vehicles vandalized) or provided an ear for me to whine into during the decision process. I was even offered a free 1970s Forest Service full-size pick-up truck from my favorite coffee barista. I don't think that sucker would get the gas mileage that the xA will be rocking, but it's a wonderful offer just the same. If only an insurance company actually looked out for its clients...